What self-respecting Adventure Team member would be caught did without his WASP Injector Knife? Just think of what this thing would do to a Pygmy Gorilla.

About The WASP:

As divers, we all know what the effects of compressed gas are underwater. Our training teaches us that our lungs would burst from over-inflation if we held our breath and rose to the surface. This principle is key to the effectiveness of the WASP Injection System.

This weapon injects a freezing cold ball of compressed gas, approximately the size of a basketball, at 800psi nearly instantly. The effects of this injection will drop many of the world’s largest land predators. The effects of the compressed gas not only cause over-inflation during ascent when used underwater, but also freezes all tissues and organs surrounding the point of injection on land or at sea. When used underwater, the injected gas carries the predator to the surface BEFORE blood is released into the water. Thus giving the diver added protection by diverting other potential predators to the surface.
The WASP Injector Knife is ideally used as a:
– Diving Knife
– Hunting Knife
– Tactical Knife

For more information, go to http://waspknife.com/about.php

After departing the town of Nilbog, our party joined a brave samurai and a knightly prestidigitator. During our travels, we came to Awad. The once fair hamlet had fallen to the cruel sword of decay. The citizens had assembled themselves with a brutish mob with a single fiendish goal: the exile of Crommard, a scholar in the field of Orcish culture. Apparently, the sage and the priest Sethus Maximi had unleashed a diabolic force during their archaeological expedition at Jawarl Avignon. With the utmost gallantry, we came to the wise man’s aid. We decided to explore the Elven ruins. Before our journey began we were assaulted by villagers aided by a treacherous youth known as Tom. After the skirmish. we stayed in the old mayor’s home. Once we gregained full strength, we set out of Jawarl Avignon. When we arrived, we were met by a malicious host. The combined orc-ogrillon troop made an ill-fated attempt to repel our valiant assault. By the grace of heaven, we vanquished the piussant humanoids. OUr success was insured by the savage archery of Elton. OUr next melee was with an orcish shaman and his foul minions. Although it was I who struck the blow of death (and mercy), the downfall of L…. Ulmus was achieved with the gracious aid of my comrades. We also managed to defeat Serga Ulmus (a half-orc cleric/assassin who was disguised as Sethus Maximi) and the legendary Mongru IV who bore the ensorcelled spear, Alkarg. After losing three comrades, we travellled to the capital with Sir Merrick, Jes, and a captive orc. There were werwe treated with the utmost magnanimosity by Sir Daromond, the periolous ruler of the Pomarj. He proved to be a most generous and courteous host. My comrade Callifrey’s fiery death reminded me to place my faith first in the Cross, secondly in my skill, and lastly in the sorcery of the old religions.

The prize treasure of the adventure was Alkarg, an enchanted spear of Orcish design. It normally gives a +1 bonus “to hit” and damage. When in the presence of elves, Alkarg glows red hot as if it has just been pulled from the forge and is then +2 “to hit” and damage. Alkarg is +3 against half-elves and +4 against elves. It also gives its bearer +2 resistance to fire-based attacks. However, this nifty little prize went to Selenius.

We lost three party members on that outing: Athelmund, a magic-user to ended up skewered on Alkarg, Elton, who was taken out by an invisible skeleton orc, and Callifrey, a paladin was incinerated by a glyph of warding.

In addition to Crusader, my cavalier, survivors were the bandit Angrimbor, the cleric/ranger Taurwen, the Roman legionaire Selenius, and the samurai Danlow.

Next up, “The Sinister Secret of Salt Marsh.”

And for your listening pleasure, the late, great Wesley Willis sings, “Cut That Mullet.”

http://www.iar-arms.com/mausereview1.htm

First Rule of Guards Club
The folks at Guards Club share my love of pith-helmeted expeditionary forces, moustachioed White Russians, and purple-clad masked avengers and my fear of the Yellow Peril and the Red Menace. They can be found at http://members.tripod.com/kriegsmann/adventuretoo.html.

At Hey Oscar Wilde! It’s Clobberin’ Time!!!, Steve Gettis has assembled “a personal art collection of various artists interpreting their favourite literary figure/author/character that has been accumulated since 03.1998.” Among my favorites are Dale Berry’s Sir Harry Flashman, Tim Bradstreet’s Nosferatu, Mike Mignola’s Jacob Marley and Dracula, Leland Purvis’s Sir Richard F. Burton, Steve Skorce’s Doc Savage, and Walt Simonson’s J. R. R. Tolkien and Michael Moorcock.

The Fantasy Novelist’s Exam
In an effort to put the kibosh on the flood of derivative fantasy novels out there, David J. Parker, along with Samuel Stoddard, came up with The Fantasy Novelist’s Exam. The quiz is designed to ferret out the derivative elements of anyone’s novel and quash its being submitted for publication. The rules are simple: Answer “yes” to any one question, and you should abandon your writing project immediately.

My favorite set of questions: “Does your novel contain orcs, elves, dwarves, or halflings? How about ‘orken’ or ‘dwerrows’?”

For the full quiz, go to http://www.rinkworks.com/fnovel/

WoAdWriMo
July is Worldwide Adventure Writing Month ’08.

Join us in expanding the number of free, downloadable adventures for tabletop roleplaying games!

The goal is to write a complete RPG adventure by July 31st, 2008.

Geek Muses
Jim of LotFP issued the following challenge to all of the blognards:

You know, when referees sit down to design their campaigns and adventures, I really don’t think they are wondering if they’re staying true to the influences of the game. Obviously someone well-versed in those influences is going to internalize them and they’ll show through to some degree no matter what, but I think a referee’s choices can make it perfectly clear what’s influencing them, what drives them to create and go through the bother to run a game for other people in the first place.

So… I challenge the role-playing blogosphere (and I know you are reading… ) to name the primary influences in your personal game, so we get a flavor not of what set of rules you decide to use, but what kind of game people can expect to play with you! Minimum five. No maximum. Plus include what people might assume influences you that you actually reject. Bonus points for detail and explanation!

Well, it just goes to show you how low the dot-con artists have now stooped. Move over Auschwitz guards and child molesters, Hell’s lowest ring needs more room.

The letter I was sent:

“SSG. IRVIN BROWN …
show details 3:05 am (3 hours ago)

READ CAREFULLY AND REPLY URGENTLY!

HELLO,

MY NAME IS (STAFF SGT.) IRVIN BROWN, I AM AN AMERICAN SOLDIER, SERVING IN THE MILITARY WITH THE ARMY’S 3RD INFANTRY DIVISION. I HAVE A VERY DESPERATE NEED FOR ASSISTANCE AND HAVE SUMMED UP COURAGE TO CONTACT YOU.

I FOUND YOUR CONTACT PARTICULARS IN AN ADDRESS JOURNAL AND I AM SEEKING YOUR KIND ASSISTANCE TO MOVE THE SUM OF EIGHT MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS (US$8,000,000) TO YOU IN UNITED STATES, AS FAR AS I CAN BE ASSURED THAT MY SHARE WILL BE SAFE IN YOUR CARE UNTIL I COMPLETE MY SERVICE HERE.

SOURCE OF MONEY:

SOME MONEY IN VARIOUS CURRENCIES WERE DISCOVERED IN BARRELS AT A FARMHOUSE NEAR ONE OF SADDAM’S OLD PALACES IN TIKRIT-IRAQ DURING A RESCUE OPERATION, AND IT WAS AGREED BY STAFF SGT KENNETH BUFF AND I THAT SOME PART OF THIS MONEY BE SHARED BETWEEN BOTH OF US BEFORE INFORMING ANYBODY ABOUT IT SINCE BOTH OF US SAW THE MONEY FIRST. THIS WAS QUITE AN ILLEGAL THING TO DO, BUT I TELL YOU WHAT! NO COMPENSATION CAN MAKE UP FOR THE RISK WE HAVE TAKEN WITH OUR LIVES IN THIS HELL HOLE, OF WHICH MY BROTHER IN-LAW WAS KILLED BY A ROAD SIDE BOMB LAST TIME.

THE ABOVE FIGURE WAS GIVEN TO ME AS MY SHARE, AND TO CONCEAL THIS KIND OF MONEY BECAME A PROBLEM FOR ME BUT WITH THE HELP OF A BRITISH CONTACT WORKING HERE AND WITH HIS OFFICE ENJOYING SOME IMMUNITY, I WAS ABLE TO GET THE PACKAGE OUT TO A SAFE LOCATION ENTIRELY OUT OF TROUBLE SPOT. HE DOES NOT KNOW THE REAL CONTENTS OF THE PACKAGE, AND BELIEVES THAT IT BELONGS TO A BRITISH/AMERICAN MEDICAL DOCTOR WHO DIED IN A RAID HERE IN IRAQ, AND BEFORE GIVING UP, TRUSTED ME TO HAND OVER THE PACKAGE TO HIS FAMILY IN UNITED STATES. I HAVE NOW FOUND A VERY SECURED WAY OF GETTING THE PACKAGE OUT OF IRAQ TO YOU AT HOME FOR YOU TO PICK UP, AND I WILL DISCUSS THIS WITH YOU WHEN I AM SURE THAT YOU ARE WILLING TO ASSIST ME AND THAT MY MONEY WILL BE WELL SECURED IN YOUR HAND.

I WANT YOU TO TELL ME HOW MUCH YOU WILL TAKE FROM THIS MONEY FOR THE ASSISTANCE YOU WILL GIVE TO ME. ONE PASSIONATE APPEAL I WILL MAKE TO YOU IS NOT TO DISCUSS THIS MATTER WITH ANYBODY, SHOULD YOU HAVE REASONS TO REJECT THIS OFFER, PLEASE AND PLEASE DESTROY THIS MESSAGE AS ANY LEAKAGE OF THIS INFORMATION WILL BE TOO BAD FOR THE U.S. SOLDIER’S HERE IN IRAQ. I DO NOT KNOW HOW LONG WE WILL REMAIN HERE, MONTH OF MAY WAS THE DEADLIEST MONTH FOR US OUT HERE. TOTALY, WE LOST 127 MEN AND I HAVE BEEN SHOT, WOUNDED AND SURVIVED TWO SUICIDE BOMB ATTACKS BY THE SPECIAL GRACE OF GOD. THIS AND OTHER REASONS I WILL MENTION LATER HAS PROMPTED ME TO REACH OUT FOR HELP. I HONESTLY WANT THIS MATTER TO BE RESOLVED IMMEDIATELY, PLEASE CONTACT ME AS SOON AS POSSIBLE WITH MY PRIVATE E-MAILADDRESS WHICH IS MY ONLY WAY OF COMMUNICATION

MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

SGT. IRVIN BROWN

Sleestaks are nocturnal reptilian humanoids that dwell in the remains of their once advanced technological/mystical civilization. They are a bit dim and are usually armed with ineffective light crossbows with ranges as follows 1″/2″/3″. they will always miss on the first shot and seldom surprise anyone because of the noisy hissing they make when excited. They do not like to operate in bright light and will flee areas of all but the mildest of illumination.
[ h/t Philotomy Jurament who posted at ENWorld ]

Sunday Night Photodump

SETTING – #3 Abandoned mine

——————————————————————————–

ENCOUNTER #1
CONTENTS – Trap (Roll of 3) TREASURE – Yes (Roll of 1)
Treasure Trap
Spring-fired darts: 1-6 darts hit for 1-4 points of damage each Unguarded Treasure
200 silver pieces
30 gold pieces

ENCOUNTER #2
CONTENTS – Trap (Roll of 3) TREASURE – No (Roll of 4)
Room Trap
Pendulum blade from ceiling: 1d8 points of damage
ENCOUNTER #3
CONTENTS – Monster (Roll of 2) TREASURE – Yes (Roll of 2)
5 Gnomes (Lawful, AC 5, Damage weapon, Morale
HP: 4 5 8 3 5 XP: 50 C

ENCOUNTER #4
CONTENTS – Empty (Roll of 5) TREASURE – Yes (Roll of 1)
Unguarded Treasure
400 silver pieces
30 gold pieces

ENCOUNTER #5
CONTENTS – Monster (Roll of 2) TREASURE – Yes (Roll of 2)
10 Killer Bees (Neutral, AC 7, Damage 1-3 + poison, Morale 6)
HP: 3 3 1 1 1 3 1 2 1 1 XP: 60 Special: Honey

ENCOUNTER #6
CONTENTS – Monster (Roll of 1) TREASURE – Yes (Roll of 1)
3 Green Slimes (Neutral, AC – [always hit], Damage special, Morale 12)
HP: 5 10 6 XP: 75 Nil

ENCOUNTER #7
CONTENTS – Trap (Roll of 3) TREASURE – No (Roll of 4)
Room Trap
Fog: Looks like Poison gas, but harmless
ENCOUNTER #8
CONTENTS – Special (Roll of 4) TREASURE – No (Roll of 4)
Moaning room or corridor

Create your own at http://www.peccable.com/roleplaying/moldvay.php.